C for Charades

A Surprising Encounter: Beach Football, Cinema, and a Misunderstood Date

Introduction:

I once held a misconception about gay guys, assuming they were all flamboyant. However, I soon learned that they come in all different shades, with some behaving and speaking just like me. This realization hit me when I unknowingly went on a date with a gay man. Let me share the story, adding some context to my behavior.

Beach Serenity:

I find solace in visiting the beach on sweltering afternoons. The sand, with its earthy and subdued texture, plays an underrated role in creating a serene atmosphere. The southern coastline holds a special place in my heart, especially the driftwood that resembles miniature lifeboats floating on the waves.

Immersed in the Beach:

As I sit close to the crashing waves, my legs buried in the sand like bread crumbs, I feel the warmth and coldness of the water, akin to forgotten tea. The ocean’s melody resonates as my fingertips dance in the water, captivated by its enchanting embrace. I remain in this tranquil spot until the tide recedes, scooping handfuls of sand that slip through my fingers like molten magma. All the while, I observe the salty waves, occasionally swaying my body as if engaged in a rhythmic chair dance.

Football Passion:

Today, instead of embracing the beach and its starfish-like relaxation, I felt a burning desire to play football. Beach football, to be precise. Everyone on our team, including myself, envisioned ourselves as the young boy from Rosario, dreaming of joining the national team and winning the World Cup someday. Those dreams still live on.

The Game-Changer:

We formed two teams, with improvised goals, ready to conquer the sandy pitch. Suddenly, a newcomer joined our team—a skillful player who seemed to outshine us all. He was not  It was as if he belonged to a professional academy or even the Premier League. His talent was remarkable, leaving us in awe of his abilities.

An Unexpected Invitation:

After the game, he approached me, and I found myself intrigued by his presence. With a friendly salute, he asked, “Hey bro, do you play professionally?” Surprised, I replied that I didn’t, but I was eager to hear his story. He shared that he used to play professionally but had chosen a different path. And then he asked a question that sparked a chain of events: “What are you doing later?”

The Movie Date:

Excitedly, I responded that I had no plans and would be interested in joining him, whatever he was upto. He then hinted we would watch a movie. However, the cinema was quite far, and I wondered about transportation. Before I could ponder further, he handed me his phone—a sleek, modern device that made my own seem inferior. We fist-bumped, he explained where we would meet, and then he mentioned picking me up in an hour.

An Unexpected Evening:

He arrived promptly, and I asked for a few minutes to get ready. I rushed to meet him, discovering an elegant SUV waiting for us. It exuded a sense of safety and comfort, with spacious seats that enveloped me like a warm embrace. Impressed, I complimented his choice of car, and we embarked on a journey that swiftly crossed the Likoni channel.

Cinema Surprises:

Arriving at the cinema, we secured recliner seats—a new experience for me, accustomed to regular seating arrangements. To my surprise, he ordered an abundance of snacks, demonstrating a different mindset. I couldn’t fathom paying such high prices for a soda that cost a fraction outside the theater.

An Unexpected Culinary Adventure:

After the movie, I expected to head home, but he suggested dining at Tamarind Restaurant. However, this was where things got complicated

I learned that you can quickly determine if a restaurant isn’t your type. First, observe the handwashing area—if it confuses you, it’s a sign you’re in the wrong place. Similarly, if a live band plays jazz, it’s best to avoid the establishment unless you’re prepared for an extravagant bill. The menu included uncooked fish wrapped in banana leaves, something called sushi, and other unfamiliar dishes. I left without fully comprehending what I had eaten.

Reflection and Recommendations:

Such awkward situations can be avoided by researching high-profile restaurants in advance. There are resources like Food Lover on Instagram, providing excellent food-related content, date spot suggestions, restaurant reviews, and cooking recipes. Checking out such platforms can enhance your dining experiences.

The fucked up part was when I was asked what wine I would want to cap off the night. Kumbe four cousins is just juice cola mixed with water? And you just let me embarrass my ancestors like that. What we got was Rupert And Rothschild Baron Edmond. I remember the name because I googled it. We literally drank my rent on a 750 ml bottle full of overstayed crushed grapes. Red wine my foot.

He told me to order anything I want because yes as you guessed, everything was on him. And in my mind, I’m like, this is my new best friend! Ain’t nobody ever treated me like this. I’m like, bro, I’m going to be the best man at this dude’s wedding, if he got a best man I’ll be the ring bearer.I don’t care. I’ll be a grown man walking down the aisle with a pillow.

A Misunderstood Conclusion:

As the night drew to a close, it was time to return home. We arrived at our original meeting spot, and everything seemed fine. We continued our conversation, both of us stepping out of the car. I found it unusual for guys to exit the vehicle together, but I didn’t consider it a red flag. Our interaction was pleasant, and I assumed he didn’t want the conversation to end.

An Unexpected Revelation:

When it was time to say goodbye, I offered a casual side hug, as guys often do. Surprisingly, he opened both his arms wide, leaving me perplexed. I hug my brother with two arms. Maybe he thinks we had a brother kind of connection, since it was a good time!  I don’t want it to be weird because I just had the time of my life, so I just commit and start making grunting noises during the hug to make me feel more like a man.

Playfully, I remarked, “Hey bro, your face touched mine. That’s kind of gay, bro.” That’s when he dropped the bombshell: “I am gay. I’m gay, and that’s why we went on this date.”

Confusion and Clarification:

Confused, I denied that we had been on a date, not realizing the implications of my actions. He reiterated, “Bro, I asked you out.” It dawned on me that I had misunderstood the situation. 

In my head I didn’t know it was a date. And I start thinking about everything. I’m like, I put my number in his phone. He picked me up. He bought me food. I was thinking about the pictures and everything. I’m like, this dude took me on a date! And I was the girl! And I liked it! Oh my God! Just the way I would have done it if I was taking a daughter of Eve out.

Reflecting on the day’s events, I realized that he had indeed taken me on a date. And I had unintentionally assumed the role of the girl. The realization left me both intrigued and unsure of my own feelings.

Conclusion:

In the end, I cleared up the misunderstanding and clarified that I am unequivocally straight. While part of me may have been tempted to explore the situation further, the other part screamed loudly in my head. Who knows? Maybe I’ll be asked out again someday, learning from this unexpected adventure and the connections we make along the way.

It better be a girl this time.